Sunday Funnies

The truest meaning of "Hang in there!"

Public Service Announcement

It is strongly recommended, that you know exactly when your period will be coming before going commando is a pair of light blue camo gauchos.

The weather is getting warmer, clothes are getting lighter, so I thought "why not?" I was certain I had a couple of 3 days to play with, but clearly I was wrong. Standing in the library, I thought "Hm, I better just check and it's off to the bathroom I go." NOOOO! I was wrong, terribly wrong, I had no days to play with. Now, I'm undergarmentless and have only ONE tampon.

I race back to the library to ask Melanie, our librarian if she had any and of course, the answer was no. UGH! I was to watch a 4th grade class in less then a half hour and needed to do something fast. So, I fly home, whipped on a pair of panties, grabbed a hand full of feminine protection and got back to the school with minutes to spare.

Now, though it was only near disastrous, it was still close enough for me to pay closer attention. Whew!!

Ah, how I love hot weather.

Here "I" am

Using the letter "I" is certainly not my favorite way to start a sentence. But, here it goes....

I SAID: If you are doing your best, that's all I ask.

I WANT: Exactly what I already have.

I WISH: People were more aware of how their actions and behaviors made others around them feel.

I HATE: Nothing.

I MISS: Not having my childhood home to return to.

I HEAR: The horrible silence of having my family out of the house.

I WONDER: Do people truly care about other people? I'm starting to think the answer is NO!

I REGRET: Any moments of disrespect I ever showed my parents and all the moments of heartache.

I AM NOT: The best I can be.

I DANCE: With my kids on my feet.

I SING: Songs I don't even like.

I CRY: When I'm happy. When I'm overwhelmingly proud of my kids. When I feel hurt.

I AM NOT ALWAYS: Able to find the line. I find myself in the midst of things I don't belong.

I MAKE WITH MY HANDS: Giggles when I tickle my kids.

I WRITE: Grammatically incorrect, so I'm told.

I CONFUSE: Many, I'm sure.

I NEED: Very little.

I SHOULD: Realize I can't save the world.

I START: Seeing people for who they are when I really pay attention.

I FINISH: Everyday grateful.

Sunday Funnies

Hm, I've gotta find myself one of these wells!

Repeat Ready!!

With the last days of school here and the end fast approaching, I am ready! Ready to spend the days outside enjoying the weather, real fun in the sun.

Anxious for those wonderful days of tanned and tired kids!




True summer time bliss!

What, I should pay?!

"Come here, let me do your toes, you're gonna love this color!" That's what I heard coming from Salena who was on the front porch last Saturday. Please, who am I to argue? I sit. She files, shapes, buffs, cleans and three coats my toes, while I sit in the sun watching the kids and enjoying small talk..

The color is OPI's Pompeii Purple and I do love it! Now that my toes are all buffed and polished, Honey and I were off to take the kids putt-putt golfing. Salena on the other hand, was off to the mall with a friend for God only knows what. She did however, take her polish just in case they decided to get pedicures while they were out. Well, she did. She arrives home and that's the first thing I notice. As we're standing there, both looking down at our feet I, with a big smirk say, "I hate to tell you this, but mine look better than yours!" We start laughing and after a smack from her she tells me, "yeah, and I had to pay for THIS!"

So again, I ask......"What, I should pay?"

I thought it was beyond me...

An affair. When I took my vows looking into the eyes of my not quite yet husband, I could never have imagined myself committing such an act. I was going to be faithful, "until death do us part."

Yet, I have found myself sneaking around to spend time with another man. It feels strange to say it out loud but some how very liberating. The encounters are brief but very satisfying and I'm extremely grateful for them. How could this have happened? What was I thinking?

He is with me always even when we are not together. I can think of nothing else when we are apart, waiting anxiously to return to him. Even as I lie in bed at night next to the man I married and love dearly, he is very close to me, literally in my hands. His name.....DAN BROWN! Bwhaaaaaa haaaaa!

I finished the Da Vinci Code.....a ridiculously great book and I'm half way through Angels and Demons, which is great also. My girlfriend Salena said the other day, "does Honey mind you having an affair with Danny?" Naturally, I laughed and said, "I don't think so, he hasn't said anything yet." Honey's pretty understanding that way. lol! I swear though, it almost feels like what an affair might be like. Stolen moments, sneaking around, getting up early and staying up until I can't hold my eyes open just to read. Insane.

An affair? I truly don't even see it happening. I am crazy about my guy and will be faithful to him always. There are times I would like nothing better than to be the cause of him drawing his last breath. But, he's mine and for better or worse I will love and support him,"until death do us part."

“Unless you marry intention to action, you end up with only a brief affair."

-Unknown

Sunday Funnies

Menopause Jewelry

My husband, being unhappy with my mood swings,

bought me a mood ring the other day so he would be able to monitor my moods.

We've discovered that when I'm in a good mood, it turns green.

When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a big friggin' red mark on his forehead.

Personal fashion consultant

Sunday evening I'm rifling through my closet, "what should I wear, what should I wear?" I had the unpleasant task of having to attend a funeral viewing and wasn't sure what I wanted wear. Slacks, a skirt, dress, what? (all black of course) I slip into my slacks and decided that I really shouldn't wear them until I bring them to the tailor, so I'm out of those and into a skirt. Fine. Now, what top will I be wearing? I pull out a fitted v-neck white T and put it on. I like the way it looks but felt it was too cool out to wear. It had been rainy all day the to temperature had dropped quite a bit for May.

So, it's off with the T. I'm standing in my bra and skirt when in fly's my fashion consultant on her way to the bathroom. Mina demands to know what I'm doing, of course without stopping. I explain while I'm pulling on a light weight high neck sweater that is a very light cream color. I hear her washing her hands and out she comes, in a hurry as she doesn't want to miss whatever it is she was watching. Running passed me, drying her hands on her pants and looking over her shoulder she says, "Mommy, I like the skirt but THAT doesn't match. But if that's all you can do!" Then she's GONE.

OK. First, it matched smarty pants. Second, I didn't' like the way it looked either, LOL! So, it was back on with the white T and off I went. I really enjoyed the freakin' nip in the air.

I laughed the rest of the evening at my little Mina. How she totally sized up the situation in a lighting bolt trip to the bathroom and one eye over her shoulder.

"When his wife asked him to change clothes to meet the German Ambassador: they want to see me, here I am. If they want to see my clothes, open my closet and show them my suits."

-Albert Einstein

Reading....It's not good for everyone!

OMGosh, for the past two weeks, aside from being ridiculously busy with the kids and their end of the year school activities and finding a few good books to read, I've been extremely neglectful. With everything. Laundry has gotten piled up, which is a NEVER for me, the fridge is barren, the kitchen has had a "closed" sign on it for a week or so now, and yes, my blogging.

Evening is the best time to lose myself in the pages. I was given this book by a friend but was upset that she spent $21.00 on it. But I thought, "Hm, since I have it, I'll read it carefully and have her return it." Sad, I know but I did it anyway. When she brought the book back the woman behind the counter said, "I bet I know why you are bringing this back." My girlfriend *gulped* and said, "You do?" It turns out the young author had plagiarized. The book was fine but I was all impressed that such a young girl had written it. Boy, who woulda thunk it? I guess I'm pretty easily impressed. :):)

This is what I'm reading now. I held off reading it because all the controversy but finally broke down. It is one of the best books I've read in a long time. I swear, it never leaves my hand. This is what is causing things like this to be said around my house...."Mommy, I have no sock", "I'm hungry, when are we going to eat?" and finally, "WHAT are we going to eat?" So you see, although reading is good, it's not good for everyone.

Words: Allies or Enemies?

Why is it, the greatness that is seen in others, by others, is so hard for those people to see for themselves? Regardless of their confidence level, when told of a wonderful gift they may posses, a beautiful physical attribute, an ability or a certain unique quality they have, it's so hard for the holder of these things to see.

Why is it, the one or two negative things said are always the things that resound in our heads? Why do we allow these things to encourage us to form such a low opinion of ourselves, to mold us? Even if they are words that were spoken to us a children, we remember and for some ridiculous reason hold on to them. It is because they are easier to believe? It is because the people that uttered these scaring words were our parents or other elders that we were to trust and respect? I personally, have for my entire life have be encouraged by my parents. I was told, I could do anything, that I was doing great when I was and encouraged and coached to do better in the areas I may have struggled in. I was never put down, belittled or made to feel inferior regardless of was I was doing. I was ALWAYS lifted up and even today at age 40, still am.

There are so many adults, and children alike that are suffering the consequence of ill spoken words by people in very important postions...Parents, teachers, coaches etc. It saddens me to see these that were affected, struggle to find their self worth, self esteem , the wonderful qualities that are so apparent to others, all because they were never encouraged in a positive way in a positive direction.

I guess my point here is...."If you don't have anything nice to say, than say nothing at all!"

You may never know how what you say will impact someone who just might have been listening.


"Treat people as if they were what they ought to be and you help them to become what they are capable of being."

-Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Roughing it!

From Friday afternoon until Sunday morning, Michael and I once again braved the outdoors. Mina, wasn't interested in going and Honey, had some work related problems. So, he stayed behind to remedy those and Mina sat in the lap of luxury at Grandma's.

We had a great time. However, I came home to a sick kid, with a sick kid.

I better put my camping hat away a get out the nurses uniform. Man oh man! I may see if I can interest Honey in some nursing. I mean, two birds with one stone, what a great thought!!