Sunday, June 17, 2007
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Divorce
Why does it happen? Better question, how does it happen? How is it, that two people could love each other enough to stand before God and witnesses and vow to love and care for one another until death.......only to end up feeling nothing but hatred.
After sharing several mile stones, emotional as well as intimate moments together......Such as the birth of their children, deaths of friends and family, purchasing their first home, finishing school, starting a business or finally getting that promotion.
After sharing secrets, fears, crazy ideas, doubts.....after sharing a toothbrush, a glass of wine and a bed, it's over.
I am of the full understanding that things change. People change, situations change, things start moving in a different direction. Granted, not always in the best direction and the changes may not be the best at the moment, but does that mean it has to end. Is there no working it out?
Did he wake up one morning and decide his life with her was just that bad. That his sex life was so unsatisfying that he just had to have his needs fulfilled elsewhere. That she just didn't keep house the way he wanted and was a lousy cook. Or, did she wake up and suddenly feel that he was uncaring and insensitive, that he was selfish in bed, didn't handle money in a responsible manner or could careless if he was in her company or not?
They're at the end and now, he dislikes her so much, he promises to quit his job before giving her cent.......Even though it's for his two children. He stops paying the mortgage and is less than a week away of having the electric turned off. So, regardless of the children and their welfare, his hate for her is so great he is willing to allow these everyday necessities to laps because of anger directed at her. She is so beside herself with hate there have been threats made to take care of things with a ball bat and hopes voiced that her attorney will rip him a new place to have a BM! Ouch! Yet just a few years ago they gazed into each others eyes and promised......
Well, I don't have any of the answers to these questions and yes there are many reasons for divorce, still I don't know why it gets that far. However, if it does, she no longer has to love, like, respect or give a rats butt about him as a man or husband.........but, because she cared enough about him at one time to plan and start a family, she must care about him as a father, because their children do. Vise versa!
So, if you can't "I Do" for each other forever, remember to "Do" for the kids!
Side note: No, it's not me threatening with the ball bat.....but for the past couple of months I've been a big ear for two girlfriends who have been struggling with the big "D." Gosh, it's just all so horrible.
Sunday, March 25, 2007
A match made to survive
A conversation regarding a couple we are friendly with came up. Honey and I were working in the yard while the kids played in the woods and on the play set near by. He starts.....
Honey: "Ya know, Monroe, he's a really nice guy. Very genuine."
Me: "Yeah, I like him. He's very funny."
Honey: "I swear you two should have hooked up. You are both exactly the same people."
Me: "Well, not exactly the same."
Honey: "Stupid! You know what I mean."
Me: "Yeah, I know. But that would leave you with Nicole. Then again you are both very much the same....it could possibly work out."
Honey: "Maybe, but it would be hard for me to be with her, now that I've been with you."
Me: "Well thank you Honey!"
Honey: "LOL, you know what I mean. Her body is so different than yours. Really different."
Me: "Well, yeah it is but you'd be OK."
Honey: "I don't know."
Me: "What about me? Monroe is like giant man. He's huge. I mean Honey, he's big!"
Honey: "Oh man! Just because I know you, I can say you'd give him a run for his money but ultimately, he'd kill you."
Me: "I know, I'd be a mere smudge on the sheet but thanks for your vote of confidence."
Honey: "We're just right!"
Me: "Yeah, we are. Aren't we?!"
It's nice to know, that although our personalities are very different, we think differently and react differently to many things he still thinks I'm the piece of life's puzzle that fits him perfectly.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
It's elementary my dear
Let me tell you, that is where it's going to stay. Yesterday, I was in a classroom that was working with children that have severe behavior disorders. There were only 6 students in the entire class and there is no way not even one more could have been added. Those 6 were like having 16.
I spent the entire day trying to keep the furniture on the floor. There were chairs being thrown along with books. Desks being flipped. Students screaming at the top of their lungs because their neighbor looked at them. And that was before lunch. Lunch, where my pleasant little girl shoved another students lunch on the floor and refused to do anything, other than sit and kick the table the entire lunch period.
Then it was back to restraining kids and ducking. I was spent by 3p but still had a good day. I truly feel for these kids and restraining them is no fun but I do it. And for that reason, I will stay in the elementary business. I'm certain a student any larger than a 4th grader would pound me into the ground.
Friday, March 09, 2007
Friday, March 02, 2007
I can't make pearls
Easy going. Those are two words I think most people that know me, would use to describe me. I don't ever worry about too much, I'm quick to laugh and slow to become annoyed or irritated about anything. Unless of course, it's something I feel very passionate about. But, there are days, moments, even just minutes, I wish I was an oyster.
Yes, an oyster. Hanging out on the ocean floor, taking in all the aquatic beauty, just chilling with my fellow oysters. Although, they too become irritated at times by foreign materials, often the tiniest grain of sand. They respond to these irritants by producing nacre, a combination of calcium and protein. This substance coats the irritating material and over time will produce a pearl. Ah, a pearl after withstanding an irritation or annoyance. See, there is something that comes of their discomfort. However, in order for us to recieve the product, the oyster must give it's life.
So, I'll never be an oyster and for the very reason I mentioned, I'm glad. But in the right frame of mind, I do see that all my trails, tribulations, annoyances and irritants are producing something in me. They are producing, trust, character, patience and increasing my faith, among many other traits I strive to display on a daily basis.
So, although I'll never produce a pearl, I hope that through my life's experiences I will become a gem of sorts. A gem that could someday be looked upon as beautiful.
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
What must she see?
Going through closets, a task that is always fun and proving to be entertaining as well. Over the weekend I thought I'd move some things around and more importantly, out of my house. I was making great progress and was just pulling out a 3/4 length, dark colored coat that was still in the dry cleaning bag when Mina appears....
Mina: "Hey Mommy, whatcha doin'?"
Me: "Oh, just going through some things."
Mina: "WOW! Look at that."
Me: "Look at what?"
Mina: "That!!" (pointing at the coat)
Me: "What about it?"
Mina: "Well, nothing. Is that what you wore back in the olden days when you were a nun?"
Me: (Naturally, trying to contain my hysteria) "No Honey, it's just a long coat."
Mina: "Oh, I thought you were a nun, a long, long, long time ago."
Me: "No, sorry Baby that wasn't me. Now go play!"
OK. There are many things wrong with that short little conversation. Because, no matter how many years you go back and apparently there are many, there is no way I could have ever been a nun, ever! (Not then and not now!)
I'm not sure which I find more disturbing...the fact that my 35 years on this earth prior to her birth she finds ancient or that I could have ever possibly been pure enough to be a nun. Hm?
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Monday, February 19, 2007
Questions that are just dumb!
After 16 years I'm not any closer to understanding why my husband asks such, well.....stupid questions. Such as.....
- Are we out of milk?
No, I thought I'd start keeping it in the kids closet for a change. You might want to check in there.
- Is this mine?
I've prepared a meal, fixed a plate and placed it on the table were you sit. It's really for the man I've been seeing but he can't make it tonight so help yourself.
- Did you buy this?
No, I've spent the last three days planning my big salad dressing in a spray bottle heist at the supermarket.
- Did you pick up the kids?
-Nah, I thought I'd let them hitch hike home from school today. It will be a good experience for them.
- Where are you?
OK, think way back....15 seconds ago of what number you dialed. Where am I? I'm HOME!
- Have you seen my blah, blah, blah?
Baby, I've seen everything you've got. It doesn't mean I have any idea where it is.
- What time is it in there?
OK, our living room and kitchen are not in different time zones. It's exactly the same time if you would just turn your head a fraction to the RIGHT!!
- Where are the kids?
Well, it's 9:15 on a Wednesday. That's right! David called, his parents are out of town, so they're over there partying.
- Are you watching this?
Hm! I'm sitting on the sofa, staring at the square box that has moving people on it and dialogue, telling a story. Nooooo, I'm not watching THAT!!
- Do you have your keys with you?
Lets see. I've just pulled into the driveway, got out of the vehicle and am heading for the house. No. I left them inside, my finger also works well in the ignition.
OK, now don't mistake this as a lack of love for my weirdo. I love him very much but what is that? UGH!!