Friday, March 24, 2006

Yes, but NOT at 3 am

First, let me just say that I'm all about good hygiene. My two "must do's" before crawling into bed are, showering and brushing my teeth....ALWAYS!

Several weeks ago I started this horrendous water drinking regimen. It's not that I'm opposed to drinking water, I don't mind it at all. It's the never ending trips to the bathroom that are killing me. (I need a bladder stretching exercise) It's an endless race, one that my kids find great humor in.

I do however, make an effort to stop drinking after 4 pm. I'm not at all about night trips, though is does happen. It's nearing the three o'clock hour and I have to go, there is no holding it. I get up and stagger across the room to our bathroom. I thinking, "ah, relief is just steps away." I never turn on the light, (just something I think is a perk about being a girl....no aiming required) I sit and SPLASH! For crying out LOUD. That's right I'm in. I haul my butt out of the bowl, NOW with the light on. I was not at all prepared for a full coolie detailing at 3 am....I had to wash, buff and dust. I swear, I just wanted to pee. Wash my hands, YES..my ass, NO!

I get myself together and get back into bed, thank goodness. In the morning I asked Honey, "Did you NOT hear a near drowning in the bathroom last night?" He laughed like some kinda freak because he knew exactly what I was talking about.

The thing is....he's TRAINED. He never, ever does that. In all the years I can't remember one time, so imagine my surprise. I guess him getting up in a state of semi-consciousness can cause certain things to happen. My son...a completely different story. He's still in training.

23 Comments:

Blogger vani said...

maybe he was sleep walking and peeing at the same time? LOL...too funny.

7:04 PM  
Blogger Aisha said...

LOL I love your blog b/c it always makes me smile :)

7:52 PM  
Blogger Kim said...

Okay, the water thing, the constant peeing should get better. I drink (have been bad lately, but got back on track tonight) eight 20 oz. bottles a day. I don't pee that much anymore.

Second, the whole toilet seat thing.....I think the only reason there is a seat to put up and down is because the women got tired of sitting on dribbles so they invented the seat for the man to put up when they went. Therefore, it is the MAN'S responsiblity to put it back down!

8:55 PM  
Blogger Meow said...

Hehehe ... sorry, I had to laugh ... you described it so well I could actually picture what happened !!
Ok, naughty Honey ... did he do that on purpose just to pee you off ??
Hope it doesn't happen again. Have a great weekend, take care, Meow

1:37 AM  
Blogger cubmommy said...

LOL! That is funny. I know what you mean though I have three males in the house and Hubby is trained but Big Cubby is not still working on that. Little Cubby is still in diapers thank goodness. I have on several occasions falling in and it sucks.

5:19 AM  
Blogger JeepGirl said...

OH thats funny as hell !!! Love it! I'm still laughing. Hope no one in the office wonders why I'm in here laughing.

Well, I guess you'll have to forgive him this one time. But at least you have yours trained.
I'm still trying to figure out how come the boys have to pee on everything on not just in the toilet. Men !

7:23 AM  
Blogger Jen Black said...

You're such a fun read! This post was funny, and I can identify. It was really fun "falling in" when I was pregnant. My only problem is that my in-laws trained their kids with the "if it's yellow let it mellow...if it's brown flush it down"...it's really hard to break him of that kind of brainwashing. And it's one more reason to hate my in-laws. So needless to say, not only did I fall in, but I dipped my booty in the mellowing yellow...yuck!

7:39 AM  
Blogger mommyof4 said...

LMAO! Oh god I would have had a hissy fit!!! You took it well!:)

8:39 AM  
Blogger Spikey1 said...

I can always blame it on The Boy! ;)

9:15 AM  
Blogger Laney said...

Been there, done that, own the t-shirt!

ROFL!!

9:25 AM  
Blogger Suz said...

ROFL ... I have a picture with a saying to this subject above the toilet on my bathroom wall. I too have had my tush washed unexpectly in the past :/

Hugs Suz

10:29 AM  
Blogger Renee said...

Ugh. My husband is pretty good about this but has had some slip ups too. Sorry about the booty wash!

11:09 AM  
Blogger Bongi-Amma said...

MEN NEED TO BE ALL MURDERED!!!! ahem or just taught to put the seat down, is it really that hard?! we should wire them up and give them electric shocks...that'll teach em ;)

2:08 PM  
Blogger owlhaven said...

yech....what I also hate is when they DON'T lift the seat while using it, and then I find the wet spot with my bum...

Mary, mom to many boys

7:14 PM  
Blogger Fantastagirl said...

LOL - sorry - but that is just too funny... we have the rule - put both lids down....

7:26 PM  
Blogger AL said...

Oh, I feel so sorry for you! I can only imagine how rude that awakening was - LOL! We're like Fantastagirl with both lids down...

Sorry for laughing at your pain - pain in the ass - LOL!

8:07 PM  
Blogger EmmaSometimes said...

oh! (giggles, giggles!!) that's terrible (giggle, giggle)

8:58 PM  
Blogger Marel Lecone said...

Aw, man, I would have been unhappily surprised too. Get those boys in line, ok? :)

9:57 PM  
Blogger truckdriver_sefl said...

That's a bad bad thing:-}

7:08 AM  
Blogger Lala's world said...

ah man!! that is so funny....guess not funny at 3 am....but hindsight it's funny..... happened to me a couple of times too...and yes to the ewwww factor!!

9:37 AM  
Anonymous angie said...

Too funny! This made me LOL!

3:21 PM  
Blogger Blogdreamz said...

Oh, the fond memories of falling in the toilet in the wee hours of the morning. Well, it wouldn't have happened if I turned on the light but I don't feel like blinding myself with the light.

8:54 PM  
Blogger sarahgrace said...

LOL! I soooo hate when that happens...
Fortunately me my hubby is trained, but I suspect it will take some time to train my little ones...

10:08 PM  

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